I will admit that I love a bad pun and a groaner of a joke, and here they are in furry friendly glory in the form of outrageous dog beds. Some of them are so incredibly far fetched and far gone that I can almost see the owners - the type that take the little yappers to the doggy hair salon. These are the people who might just purchase a midcentury design dog sofa, pink faux fur canopy, or a wrought-iron dog bed or the jeweled crown or perhaps the shabby chic style. I see in my mind's eye the little canine's owner being a cross between Joan Rivers and a child-pageant stage dad. Oh, I mean a dog show stage dad.

The ones that really get me going are the cupcake bed (it even has sprinkles on it -- such a sweet detail), the Sniffany + Co. (a plush, Tiffany, blue, gift-box bed with signature white ribbon), and the Chewy Vuiton (a lay-down, plushy bag in brown or white, complete with the CV logo pattern). And my favorite, partially because it makes no sense, is pictured: a giant perfume bottle of Chewnel. So silly it makes me howl.

There are of course some eco-friendly ones here and I will tell you about their earth-loving fabulousness. They are made with IntelliLoft:

"Created from post-consumer recycled plastic bottles, IntelliLoft™ is safe, re-engineered fibers that diverts unnecessary waste from going to your landfill and takes six times less energy than producing fabric from virgin fibers."

Forgive me for saying this, but the green beds are visually so boring in comparison to the aforementioned (wacky) beds. Although, they are, of course, much better for the earth and, I am sure, your pup. Some of  the ones made with IntelliLoft are made of completely recycled materials, inside and out. I am sure their simple colors, like camel, and the organic cotton in the organic bumper bed and more colorful four-patch one, will suit many more than the $1,400 doggy Hepburn Bed does. Or buy the doggy Murphy bed and you can still feel good about yourself and your pooch in the morning.

But still, there's a doggy sleigh bed, a boat bed (with anchor toy), a Furrari (yuk yuk), a "Woof airplane", a HollyWoof stretch limo, and a tea cup bed. And if that's all too much, there's a simple pillow that says Bitch.

I mean it's kind of hard to resist. I am lucky I don't have a dog. But there is a cat bed that says Pussy on it and I do have cats.

You can see many of these and more here.

Theo Kogan is the MOLI View's contributing editor for Fashion & Design. Her THEOlogy column appears Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Okay, yes, Phelps and his multiple medals, American pixies with linebacker shoulders winning gold in gymnastics, equestrians in top hats and tails sweating it out on top of a 1700-pound stallion doing the 15th-century piaffe. Whatever. My nephew, now there's a phenomenon. My nephew is 13 months old. But he's the kind of 13 months old that makes the entire apartment give a quiet but palpable shudder: he's not 13-months strong, he's more like four-year-old strong.

He's also a climber, a stepper-onner, a lifter, and most of all, an explorer. He is a relentless athlete whose playing field is a tidy one-bedroom. And given that his parents are both long-legged and his father is also extremely tall to boot, he's a grower. A grower-outer-of-er. He is soon going to be literally climbing the walls. His Olympic sport at the moment is toddler track and field: dash down the hall, run into the coffee table, push all of its contents off to the floor, then, without losing even a fraction of a second, head into the bedroom for a head-first lunge vault onto the bed. Degree of difficulty, for my sister: Extreme.

Like many young families in NYC, my sister is trying to get by in this apartment that's become  legend for its low rent (so 20th century, my gosh, even early '90s). Instead of throwing all their life savings, retirement, rainy day cushion, and stress into an overpriced co-op, they're digging into their 600-square feet. The son, though, he's going to need some personal space. Right now, the entire place is his personal space. There is a little nook in the bedroom (so many apartment dwellers wind up redefining the word "room" into "nook," as if we're little mice). But he's going to need a more centralized structural containment system, and soon.

Fortunately, there is an architect-turned-furniture-designer who has a plan that would contain (more like fascinate and engage) even my nephew. Roberto Gil is a furniture designer who trained at Harvard's architecture school, worked at the very prestigious firm Fox & Fowle, and then, for some reason, turned his attention toShe always has those pithy lines children's furniture. Born in Buenos Aires, he has a playful appreciation for shape, for construction, for color in bountiful swaths. He also knows how to build like nobody else. Since 1992, first in Tribeca, then in DUMBO, and now in Red Hook, he's been designing and building furniture that kids love and grown-ups admire - and are used and beloved by t